Breezy Mama

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Parents Magazine

Taming the Tyrant – Your Three-Year-Old

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The three-year-old development. . .  A wonderful stage where life is getting easier with your little one–they are now able to handle more responsibility, are going off to preschool and you may find yourself having more fun since they can participate in more “grown-up” activities. But, with this greatness comes a need for expressing their opinion (which many times differs from yours) and a want to do everything on their own, their way. Handling a three year old can takes a lot of patience and goodwill, so Breezy Mama turned to Dr. Fran Walfish for advice on overcoming the hardest behaviors. . .

Why are the “two’s” considered “terrible” when it’s really the three’s that are gnarly?

THE “TERRIBLE TWO’S” SEEM TO HAVE BECOME THE “TERRIBLE THREE’S” FOR THE FOLLOWING REASON.  ORIGINALLY, RESEARCHERS BELIEVED THAT THE RAPPROCHEMENT PHASE OF DEVELOPMENT OCCURS FROM 18 MONTHS- 3 YEARS.  IN MY LARGE PRIVATE PRACTICE WHERE I HAVE TREATED THOUSANDS OF YOUNG TODDLERS, I OBSERVE THAT THIS PHASE OF DEVELOPMENT RESOLVES CLOSER TO AGE 4 YEARS.  THAT IMPLIES THAT WHAT WE USED TO SEE IN TODDLERS AROUND AGE 2 IS NOW BEING OBSERVED AT AGE 3 YEARS.  THESE BEHAVIORS INCLUDE AN INCREASE IN OPPOSITION, DEFIANCE, AND CLAIMING ONESELF AS A SEPARATE BEING FROM MOMMY AND DADDY.  THIS MAY INCLUDE TEMPER TANTRUMS, HITTING, DELAYS FOLLOWING COMMANDS, AND GENERALLY REQUIRING MORE TEACHABLE MOMENTS.  THIS PHASE INVOLVES THE RHYTHMIC [Read more…] about Taming the Tyrant – Your Three-Year-Old

Stop the Madness: Breaking the Lovey, Thumb Sucking, Pacifier Habit

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I am the mother of two kids: a four year-old who sucks his fingers and twirls my hair (his own when I’m not around) and a 21 month-old who has a blanket that isn’t more than a foot away from her at all times. My son has been sucking his fingers since he was two weeks old–I kid you not. And, the habit never really bothered me–until things like the swine flu hits or, the fact that he’s getting closer to kindergarten. As for my daughter, that blanket has been a lifesaver in too many different ways, but I am dreading the day when I tell her it can’t come out of her room. So, how does a parent stop these habits? What may seem like a hopeless and daunting task, CAN be done. Breezy Mama turns to Dr. Frances Walfish, Psy.D. for some help.

It seems to me as if children hang on to five things: a bottle, a pacifier, finger/thumb sucking, hair twirling and a lovey. Should all be stopped?

Eventually all of these habits should be stopped.  And they will.  Let’s first begin by understanding why these things are helpful and good.  They are all Transitional Objects (T.O.).  T.O.’s are encouraged with [Read more…] about Stop the Madness: Breaking the Lovey, Thumb Sucking, Pacifier Habit

Toddler Hitting: What to do About It

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Ahhhh, toddlers. Such cute things that seem to do no wrong. . . until they burst into a temper tantrum at 100 MPH and start hitting you like there’s no tomorrow. That–not so cute. So, what can you do about it? How do you teach a little person who can barely express what they’re thinking to not hit–whether they’re hitting for fun or because they’re mad? Breezy Mama turned to child expert Frances Walfish, Pys. D. for some answers. . .

Note: Keep in mind that these answers pertain to children 1 – 3 years of age.

Let’s start with the basics–why do toddlers hit?

Toddlers hit for a number of different reasons.  They include: [Read more…] about Toddler Hitting: What to do About It