Search Results for: fran walfish

Is Your Child Grumpy? Or is it Stress?

file8831296040573Stress–something that we parents think we’re only affected by, but our kiddos can get stressed too–super stressed. One day, I was talking to a friend who’s child is friend’s with mine–she begins to tell me that her child has been crying easily, gets super frustrated, and has NOT been wanting to go to school. “Same with mine,” I exclaim. The next day I have the same conversation with a different friend, and then again with yet another friend. What was going on? Was it the beginning of second grade? Turning eight? I decided that we needed answers, STAT, and turned to Breezy Mama‘s Go-To child and family psychotherapist, Dr. Fran Walfish, for help.

Some kids hold stress in – what are the signs we moms should look out for that indicate our child may be stressed out?

Some kids hold stress in while others act-out. Know your child’s norm and be vigilantly aware of changes. Here are some of the classic signs your child may be stressed out: [Read more…]

Pros and Cons of Four Parenting Styles


Think your way is the ONLY way to parent? Think again! Kidding… kind of… Breezy Mama turned to Dr. Fran Walfish, a child and family psychotherapist, to discuss the different parenting styles (be sure to tell us in the comments which style is yours!) and what to do when your style doesn’t exactly match (ahem) your husband’s. Plus! The pros and cons of each style.

Before we get to the actual parenting styles, why is it important to know your own parenting style?

Understanding yourself gives you choices, and when you choose to respond in a specific way, rather than respond automatically, situations more often than not resolve themselves favorably.  Research supports the fact that a child who was [Read more…]

How to Stop Siblings From Bullying Each Other


Recently, there were headlines about how damaging simple sibling fighting can actually be after a study’s findings. As a second born child, I remember being told often that things I liked were stupid, I was “dumb”, etc. etc. Frankly, it did suck and, when it happens to the younger child, it’s by the person they generally look up to. Naturally, I’ve gotten sweet revenge..kidding… kind of… Joking aside, can hurtful comments older siblings make be detrimental to a younger child? How can parents keep sibling interaction healthy? Breezy Mama turned to Dr. Fran Walfish, a child and family psychotherapist who appeared on Fox News to discuss this very issue.

According to the study, sibling bullying can lead to “anger, depression or anxiety” in the child on the receiving end. At what point can natural sibling fights become detrimental psychologically to a child?

Parents need to keep their [Read more…]

Are Dads Better Than Moms?


Yes, I’m aware that you read that headline and spit out your coffee with part disbelief and part laughter. How could Breezy Mama ever imply such a notion? In fact, I have read a few articles lately saying how the care-free parenting approach stereotypical with fathers can benefit children in the long run and those raised by a stay at home dad have an advantage over those children stuck with us uptight, play by the rules moms. For real? Turning to Child and Family Psychotherapist Dr. Fran Walfish, I just had to get to the bottom of this obvious rubbish… kidding… kind of.

A few articles have come out in the press comparing moms to dads lately, saying dads are more care-free in their parenting. For example, dads don’t mind if a child gets muddy, which, in theory allows them to explore and use their imagination. Meanwhile, a mom might stereotypically encourage the same child to slow down, not get hurt and not to ruin their outfit, which, in theory, teaches them to be cautious and to care for things. What are the advantages to both types of parenting?

I agree that [Read more…]

Question of the Day: Instant Gratification

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Do you ever have one of those episodes with your children where you wonder, “When is he going to stop doing this?” Your child does something weird, aggravating, or just won’t grow out of a phase? Wish you had someone there to give you the help and advice you’re seeking? Well, your in luck. Breezy Mama is very excited to introduce our Question of the Day piece. A simple (ha!) parenting question with the answer you need. Even more exciting is who will be doing the answering. . . Dr. Fran Walfish, who is an Expert in Parents Magazine’s “Ask Our Experts” column, has agreed to become our “Question of the Day” expert! So send us your questions ( and Dr. Walfish will answer it in a future Breezy post. Now on to today’s question. . .

When do children understand that [Read more…]

How to Help Someone Else’s ‘Bad’ Kid (or Yours)

Childhood is a pivotal time to shape who a child will be for the rest of their lives. If you have a kid in your life and/or child’s school that is “bad,” there could be a variety of reasons why. Whether it be something going on at home or they simply are struggling in general or possibly suffering from something like oppositional defiant disorder, there are ways you can help this child have a shot at a positive future without detrimentally being labeld at a young age. Breezy Mama turned to Child and Family Psychotherapist Dr. Fran Walfish for tips on how to help with behavior modification.

How dangerous is it to label a child as “bad”. In other words, can this shape the choices they make for life?

When you label a child “bad” it is not only dangerous, but a [Read more…]

Stop the Back Talk and Keep Your Patience

Ahhh, seven-year olds. They’re getting older and wiser, but with this independence can come back talk, disrespect and ungratefulness. I don’t know a more frustrating behavior, and teaching how to NOT be like that seems close to impossible. Breezy Mama turned to Child and Family Psychotherapist, Dr. Fran Walfish, Psy.D. for help.

I’ve heard that 7-year-olds tend to be “too cool.” Stories of children talking back, rolling their eyes and being ungrateful seem to be common. Tell them to pick something up and they answer, “Why should I?” Many times, it seems as if I hear these type of stories when children are [Read more…]

How to Handle Your Child’s Tantrum. Plus! Do they Ever Stop?

terrible twos tantrums, tantrum, child tantrums, tantrums, dealing with tantrums, toddler, stop tantrums, children tantrums, toddler tantrum, temper tantrum,temper tantrums, how to deal with tantrums, child tantrum, tantrums in children, tantrum definition, definition of tantrum, define tantrum, tantrums meaning, tantrums toddlers, tantrum baby, toddler tantrums, tantrums children, baby tantrum, tantrums definition, tantrums toddler, tantrums in toddlers, children and tantrums, toddler temper tantrums, children with tantrums, toddlers and tantrums, kids and tantrums, how to stop tantrums, toddlers tantrums, throw tantrum, baby tantrums, tantrum meaning, how to stop a tantrum, dealing with children, how to handle a tantrum, children tantrum, how to handle tantrums, tantrum child, throwing a tantrum, define tantrums, dealing with toddlers, tantrum children, tantrum toddler, child temper tantrums, kid tantrums, child temper tantrum, kids tantrums, frances walfish, dr. fran walfish, The Self-­Aware Parent: Resolving Conflict and Building a Better Bond with Your Child  I never realized how easy I had it with my son–a tantrum would rarely occur, and when it did, it was easy to handle and was over in the blink of an eye. Then, my daughter came along. Don’t get me wrong, 99% of the time she’s sweet as pie, but at times, she can be described as a hurricane. A screamer, she lets everyone know that when she’s mad, she’s MAD. Yes, she’s a tantrum thrower. Completely unprepared for this sort of behavior, I didn’t know how to handle it. Knowing I’m not alone in wondering how to deal with tantrums, I turned to Breezy Mama‘s Go-To Child and Family Psychotherapist, Dr. Fran Walfish, Psy.D. for help.

What triggers a tantrum?

Temper tantrums are absolutely natural and expected during toddlerhood which I define as 18 months – 4 years of age.  The goal of the toddler is to claim himself as a separate being from Mommy.  He has many objectives to achieve during this crucial period of development.  In addition to separation, his goals include [Read more…]

Dealing with Preschool and Elementary School Separation Anxiety

Think separation anxiety ends with infants? Think again. In fact, children anxiety can lead some kids to suffer well into elementary school. In addition to tears flowing as mommy walks away, preschoolers and elementary school age students can experience physical pain as well. Breezy Mama briefly touched on the topic of separation anxiety last week, but followed up with Dr. Fran Walfish to find out why some children have a hard time saying good-bye, what parents can do about it, when to seek kids therapy and more on anxiety and kids.

My kids can’t get to school fast enough – is there something I should be concerned about? In all seriousness, why do some kids have such a hard time being dropped off at school?

You are pointing to Separation Anxiety. This requires you, the parent, to take a hard, honest look within. Are you able to praise every increment in your child’s moving away from you? This includes making his own decisions, choices, and even disagreeing with your ideas? Or, do you [Read more…]

Beware: Preschool Mean Girls and Boys and Helping Your Child Cope

Now that I’ve been at this parenting thing for seven years, I have to say one of the more shocking things I’ve come across is the fact that the notorious “mean girls” (& boys!) begin at age 4. And I’m not joking. I’ve been in parent group discussions with a mom in tears because she isn’t sure what to do about her daughter being left out every day; I’ve over heard some of the harshest words come out of a kid’s mouth toward another; And I’ve witnessed both boys and girls being left out of cliques. It starts young and it certainly doesn’t get better from there. Breezy Mama turned to Dr. Fran Walfish to get tips on how to handle when your child is left on the outside of a clique, the skills to give them to deal with children who are rude to them, what to do when your child is the culprit and more.

The first time I heard there were cliques in preschool I pretty much laughed. I’ve since witnessed how harsh it can be for a child… and worse for their mom. How are kids already purposely excluding other kids at such a young age?

Yes, it came as a surprise to me too. It’s hard to imagine that children so young can be exclusive. It seems to begin earlier and earlier with each generation. I have seen 3 year-old girls [Read more…]