Tips for Raising an Introvert and an Extrovert

Just like some kids may have blue eyes and others brown, not all personalities are the same. How can parents determine whether a child is an introvert or an extrovert? And how should they tailor their parenting accordingly? Breezy Mama turned to Alice Iorio, M.Ed. — Author of Champion Parenting: Giving Your Child a Competitive Edge— to help parents learn the best approach for raising an introvert or an extrovert.

What are the signs a child is a true introvert versus just shy in new situations?

A true introvert will not make eye contact with you, or even attempt to communicate with you or with others. When pressed
to respond, they will begin to show signs of becoming truly physically and emotionally stressed, which can be often times very painful for them.

Do some children have traits of both an introvert and an extrovert and how do you tailor your parenting to their personality?

Yes — body language never lies. New surroundings or experiences
can make a person uncomfortable. I suggest observing their body
language, and stepping in when the situation becomes too uncomfortable for them. After all, you want to build confidence and trust.

When children are toddlers,how can parents determine whether they are an introvert or extrovert?

With toddlers, it will not be that easy to determine whether they are
an introvert or extrovert. After all, this age group is just beginning to experience the world around them.

What should a parent be aware of when raising an introvert/ how should the tailor their parenting?

Slow and steady is the course of action. Provide small successful steps, to build a level of confidence and trust.

What are the signs a child is an extrovert?

Extremely outgoing! Loves the attention, and looks for opportunities to be noticed.

What should a parent be aware of when raising an extrovert/ how should they tailor their parenting?

Provide opportunities to shine. Acknowledge their strengths and let them run with them.

What kind of classes should parents put their child in? For example would a dance class make a child more of an extrovert than an art class?

Look for the talents and gifts that this child already possesses. Try a variety of classes to see where his passions are, and where his comfort level is.

Does my child’s future success depend on whether they are an
introvert or extrovert?

No! I believe future success depends on finding one’s passion in life. This is universal for all personality types.

What tips do you have for bringing an introvert “out of their

I suggest presenting situations whereby the child can meet
success immediately. For example, it can be as simple as allowing the
child to hand a clerk the money in a store. Or going to the library
and allowing the child to ask the librarian a question. After a
movie, discussing the characters, his thoughts, etc. involving the
child in planning an event, a trip, a meal, or asking for his opinion
on a matter. The rule parents need to remember is to “engage this
child” in a fun and familiar activity whereby he feels comfortable
asking questions and responding without being forced. In other words,
set the stage for him to succeed!

If my child is an extrovert, should I be extra worried about
stranger safety (because they talk to EVERYONE)?

I would gently remind the child of a few safety tips, and to also remind him to be aware of and not to ignore his gut feelings.

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About Alice Iorio, M.Ed.
For more than 25 years, Alice Iorio, has inspired both children and parents nationwide on how to successfully compete and succeed at all levels of education. Her award-winning teaching career spans a range of preschool through college age.

Having taught in the Florida public schools, and experienced the challenges facing parents today, Iorio was led to share her knowledge and expertise with her latest book, Champion Parenting: Giving Your Child a Competitive Edge In this book, Iorio encourages and empowers parents (Preschool-college age) with her coaching skills and positive mind set to help children reach their goals successfully.

Visit for more information.

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